Do You Read Me? (1): The Moment Before Hiring, As Narrated By Your Portfolio PDF

The Moment Before Hiring, As Narrated By Your Portfolio PDF

“Portfolio_compressed_compressed.PDF” is being uploaded!

PDF is too large to upload.

PDF re-exported at “smallest file size.”

“Portfolio_compressed_compressed_compressed.PDF” has been successfully uploaded!

PDF feels depleted and a bit agitated by the term “smallest.”

PDF wonders if the diminishment of a body of work to 5MB is a metaphor for the devaluation of the role of the architect in society.

“Portfolio_compressed_compressed_compressed.pdf” has been downloaded!

PDF breaks out in a cold sweat.

PDF meets applicant cohort in the Inbox. Among them are five voracious readers, 27 skilled collaborators, and three thought leaders.

PDF opened.

PDF overhears laughter on page 12 and the comment, “Imagine trying to build phenomenal transparency in Revit!”

Anger and resentment builds in PDF, torn between a devotion to the design genius of Creator and a commitment to earning Creator’s health insurance.

PDF decides it’s safest not to load page 13.

PDF returned in an email to Creator containing the words “unfortunately” and “blank.”

PDF moved to Recycling Bin. Cries a bit. Fears good intentions may be misunderstood by Creator.

PDF is shortened and renamed “Work_Sample.PDF” by aggrieved Creator.

PDF excited about new identity as Work Sample.

PDF uploaded with resolve.

“Work_Sample.PDF” has been downloaded!

Preamble:
Do You Read Me is a recurring column that uses humor as a way of cutting through academic jargon while thoughtfully communicating something about the discipline of architecture. It is situated at the intersection of punditry, poetry, and absurdity.